Leading Ain't Easy
Leadership looks shiny on social media. But the reality is it’s messy, isolating, and full of self-doubt. Leading Ain’t Easy pulls back the curtain on the side of leadership nobody puts on their résumé.
Hosted by Ryan Calkins (Marine Corps veteran, career/leadership coach, and founder of Reframe & Rise) and Erny Epley (public-sector leader and founder of Bus Pro Network), this show dives into the raw, unfiltered truths of leading others; whether it’s in the military, the public sector, or the private world of business.
We’re not here with corporate buzzwords or textbook definitions. Instead, you’ll hear:
- Honest stories about the challenges and failures that shaped us.
- Real conversations about the doubts and decisions leaders wrestle with every day.
- Lessons, frameworks, and laughs that remind you you’re not alone in the struggle.
Episodes run 45-60 minutes (long enough to go deep, short enough for a commute) and drop weekly. Some weeks it’s just us, other weeks we’ll bring in guests (current and aspiring leaders) to share their own unfiltered journeys.
If you’ve ever wondered whether you’re cut out for this role, questioned yourself after making a hard call, or felt like a fraud even with the title… this podcast is for you.
Because leading ain’t easy, but you don’t have to do it alone.
Leading Ain't Easy
Episode 6 - Fix Your Face: How Your "Tell" Can Make or Break Your Leadership
You don’t have to say a word for people to know exactly what you’re thinking.
Sometimes your face gets there first.
In Episode 6 of Leading Ain’t Easy, Ryan and Erny dig into the idea of “Fix Your Face” and how your nonverbal tells can completely change the way people experience your leadership.
In this episode, we cover:
- Why you can’t “not communicate”
A workshop exercise makes it painfully obvious: even when you’re silent, your body and face are saying plenty. - When your emotions live on your face
Ryan talks about getting in trouble for “lack of bearing” in Marine Corps boot camp and how that same struggle followed him into his professional life. - The coworker who kept whispering “fix your face”
How one colleague’s honest feedback turned into a mantra Ryan still uses in every tough meeting. - Erny’s public board meeting lesson
A clerical error, a very public question, and the moment his panic face cost him trust and put his work under a microscope. - Authentic vs. unfiltered
Being real doesn’t mean letting every reaction show. You don’t have to give everyone your unedited response to be honest and trustworthy. - Tools to keep your bearing when you disagree
- Micro-resets: adjust your posture, take a sip of water, breathe
- Re-centering questions: “Why are we here?” and “What’s the actual objective?”
- Using silence to collect your thoughts instead of firing back defensively
- Choosing where (and with whom) to vent
Why it’s healthy to have safe people and places to unload, and how venting in front of your team can quietly erode trust in you and your organization. - Leading with intention, not impulse
How to stay human and expressive while still being intentional about the message your face, body, and tone are sending.
If you’ve ever been told, “your face is saying a lot right now,” this one’s for you.
Leading Ain’t Easy is hosted by Ryan Calkins and Erny Epley.
- Ryan is the founder of Reframe & Rise, a career and leadership coaching practice helping veterans and other professionals realign their work and lead with purpose.
- Erny runs Bus Pro Network, supporting school transportation leaders across California with training and development.
Subscribe to the show on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen.
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